Holiday Safety Briefing

December 14, 2020

As classes start to wind down for the Christmas holiday, we are visiting all of the schools, encouraging the girls as they get ready for their end of term exams, but also giving them a holiday safety briefing.

As expected, the children are happy to get a break from school; schools will break for two weeks. After being home for so long due to the Corona virus, most of the girls have had a hard time readjusting back to the school routine. There is a lot of excitement, much more on going home, of course, than sitting for their exams.

Our usual holiday briefings are concentrated on the need for the teenagers to be responsible in everything they do. We caution them against the use of drugs and alcohol, not going out in unfamiliar places alone, to always let someone know where they are when out of the house, to be responsible while using Ihe internet, not to send naked or compromising pictures of themselves to other people. We caution the girls against using social media irresponsibly, in a way that could ruin their lives or someone else’s. We encourage the girls to say NO as often as possible when in doubtful situations. We remind them to always have pocket money when they leave home, so they can easily get transport back to safety, if they feel threatened in a situation. We advise the girls to think before they act and again, when in doubt, to err on the side of caution.

One topic that always disturbs our spirit, is rape or molestation. When a student walks up to us after the briefing and says she is not looking forward to the holidays because she is scared of being sexually molested, it breaks our hearts, especially as fathers have become big culprits in this tragedy . Just this morning there was a story of a man who has sexually molested his two daughter, a 17-year-old and a 16-year-old. The 17-year-old has already given birth, and the 16-year-old is 5 months pregnant. Their mother who quit the marriage because of domestic violence reported the matter to the Children’s Department. This kind of news pains us gravely, and our prayer to one day run a half-way house where these kind of girls can be sheltered, still stands.

Imagine the horror of living in a dangerous home, knowing a monster of a parent is ever-present. We report such cases to the school administration, hoping the school will involve the Children’s Department and send the girls to a rescue center. Unfortunately, many of these cases go unreported; the girls are too scared to speak up, scared of the consequences.

Women need to be empowered, so that when they face domestic violence, and decide to leave their marriages, they do not leave their children behind. Most of the incidences that we have encountered, are from homes where the mother has left, and the children are with their father or a relative.

Why would men initiate sexual contact with their own genetic daughters? Even more difficult to explain is why fathers would engage in such conduct with their sexually immature daughters.

To the mothers, it is a devastating betrayal and in certain devasting cases, a mother will refuse to protect her daughter against this type of abuse. Even in the face of clear evidence that her partner is abusing her child, a mother who, is in denial, may simply stand by and allow the abuse to continue, often for a period of years. The legal dilemma of how to deal with such situations is further complicated by indications that the greatest harm to the child is caused not by the physical abuse itself, but rather by the mother’s failure to acknowledge the abuse or to believe her child when the child confides in her.

To the molesters, it could be so many things, usually it is because the person is so selfish they only care about themselves and their life and lifestyle. The molesters are often sociopathic and should be held accountable and punished for their apathy and lack of empathy. The victim will inevitably grow up to feel unworthy of love as those charged with protecting her, were the very ones who betrayed her. The victim will most likely, become distrustful of everyone, even those closest to her, because in her mind, everyone is capable of horrendous betrayal, no matter how much they claim to love you. It is extremely sad.

We comfort these girls by telling them it is not their fault nor is it a reflection of their worth and value. Rather, such abuse, stems from the actions of a selfish coward who never deserved to bear the title of father.

We encourage the girls to speak up when they sense danger as keeping quiet only protects the predators, who will eventually molest other girls.


It is a dark world for any child who has suffered sexual harassment.

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